Friday, August 15, 2008

Work in Progress

Well time to pull out the ol' html. I took a class a while back and now I need it for this blog. Always learning, always growing - that's how our minds should be. I'll hopefully be posting a blog on interests of mine, thoughts for the day, etc.

A little intro -

I was born in Philly and I've lived in - Hooks TX, San Diego CA, Hornbrook CA (pop. 200) and now Salem. Married to a wonderful man Rich and we have a beautiful, smart, caring daughter Amy. Two grandchildren - Zoey 6 and Brandon 3. Zoey is like looking at Amy at the same age and little Brandon - his bright blue eyes are magic. He was diagnosed with autism and I'm learning all I can about it and will be posting links I find interesting for those interested.

I worked most of my life from age 18 to 45. Early retirement was a blessing and a curse LOL. I am still trying to find my way. I've had thyroid problems and found out from a routine blood test I had Hepatitis C. My way is to research and find out all I can and fight like hell with a positive attitude. I went through treatment - similiar to chemotherapy. It was not fun but I came out the other side - I am "clear" of the disease and had six months of thanking God I didn't have to go through any more treatment. I started feeling tired, achy and numb in some parts of my body. This was before I learned fibromyalgia is hereditary. I've had arthritis after I had rheumatic fever at age 9. I got treatment and it flared up now & again but this time it came on full force. My husband has been my rock through all this.

I met my hubby in a country western bar in Philadelphia. He was in the Navy and was leaving for his home port in two weeks. We date from the moment we met and he asked me to marry him 13 days later - and I accepted. He went through rehab for alcoholism. It wasn't until much later we found out the reason for his alcoholism - PTSD from Viet Nam. He was misdiagnosed at depressive, clinically depressed, bipolar and finally PTSD & depression. Another cause I am passionate about - veterans with PTSD and how they are treated. We only found out recently he has ADD. His counselor said bipolar and ADD are so similiar - I believe that. He only had the depressive qualities though so we were puzzled by the bipolar diagnosis.

Our daughter Amy - she is part of my heart. She is generous, funny, beautiful, smart, caring. She's had her demons also and at 24 went through a lot of things I never dreamed of at that age. Zoey's father is 10 years older than she. When they met he was an alcoholic and Amy was on probation. I made a lot of bad decisions at that time. She wanted to stay at her friend's house and Wayne was the head of the household. Amy had run away a few times, was on probation and could not be tied down with rules. She wanted to move back home but I said she had to have rules (she was under 18) and she made the choice to go with Wayne. They ended up in Tucson (where he's originally from) and she told me she was pregnant. In my opinion Amy was too young. I was 26 when I had her and even then I was scared. So much responsibility for a life. I saw Zoey at one week old and saw what a good mother Amy was.

Amy and Wayne had an abusive relationship due to them both being immature. She had told me she was a topless dancer and it broke my heart. I knew that wasn't a good job - Amy was better than that. She started to hate the job or herself not sure which and got addicted to drugs. She was taking methadone to get off of oxycontin - trading one bad thing for another. I saw the chaos in her life. She left Wayne and met Brandon and was pregnant with little Brandon (Bubba).

Bubba's aunt pressed charges and Amy & Brandon have been clawing their way over the wall ever since. Amy was pregnant and lost little Roman Gabriel on November 30, 2007. It broke Rich's and my heart. Amy & Brandon have lost custody of their son but I do hope she'll try and see & talk to her daughter. Zoey is old enough to know her mom doesn't see her enough. Wayne is being the best dad he can be and not drinking.

My family means a lot to me and not being able to fix things - it hurts. I want my grandkids & daughter to come over to my house and have dinner, hang out and watch a movie together. I am mostly a positive thinker - it's gotten me through a lot of hard times.

I want to be the best I can be. I'd love to write a book, learn another language, travel with Rich and our daughter and grandkids to DisneyWorld & Disneyland. I still have a long way to go . . . .

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